It’s OK to be Tired

I’m Tired

You can lie there

and contemplate your next move

Sing as loud as you want

feeling that groove

Walk until you get tired

Or imagine a meal you know will be fire

But when you get out of that bed

and step out into the world

it seems like the entire world is a mean girl

Or you step in front of the mic

for your grand debut

Your voice cracks on you

You can enter that marathon you’ve walked for everyday

And your fucking knee decides it wants to ache

You can start that meal and take one turn

Before you know it

Your bread is burned

This is how life happens for me

I get up

Do the things

And

Boom

Anxiety

POW

Life takes it’s toll on me

The tears well up

and I’ve nowhere to go

My heart is broken

after continually trying

with nothing to actually show

This isn’t me feeling sorry for myself

Or thinking I’m unworthy

Nor is it a plea for anyone to fill this empty cup

This is something else entirely

It’s my confession

I’m ready to give up

I’m seeking the help I need, and finding ways to work this out. Most of the time, for me, writing helps. So again, this is me trying. Hoping that tomorrow finds me feeling better. Purging isn’t for the lighthearted to do, or witness. Honesty is terrifying when it seems there’s nothing to be done about what is hurting you.

If you woke up feeling like you’d rather not be here, I empathize. If you got up despite wanting to stay in bed and cry, I feel you. This in no way means you don’t know your worth, because I’m still worthy. Some days, I just feel as if I can’t catch a fucking break.

“I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired”

wishing everyone wellness; wholeness; & love returned, wholeheartedly

ASH

https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=web&utm_campaign=onebox